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Road Rage

A lot of people seem to lose their minds when it comes to driving.  All it takes is one person not using their turn signal and a soccer mom with a van full of kids will turn into a vicious, hate-spewing demon.  It’s sort of funny in that sad, absurd way.  But it sure as hell isn’t healthy.

So I came up with a healthy habit to replace screaming at people who merge unsafely, run red lights, or speed while texting on their phones.  I clap!

Yeah, that’s it.  They do something dumb, stop at a light, and I raise my hands up and clap for them.  Maybe it’s just one step below road rage, maybe it’ll antagonize someone and get me shot, but at least my F-bomb count has dropped.

Earlier today I got to see the fruits of my labor in action.  A woman in a rusted-out van tried to pass in front of me while approaching a red light.  I accelerated a little bit because what she was doing clearly looked unsafe, so she responded my kicking it up to at least 45 in a 35 approaching a 25.  Smart move, lady.  I let her pass in front me so she could be first to the big shiny red light.

Then I let loose the clapping, high above my steering well.  “Congratulations, lady!  You did it!  You won the red light race!”  Then she flipped me off.  All I could do was laugh.  I could have just yelled and screamed at this lady who was clearly not acting in anyone’s best interests, but instead I found my own way to piss her off.  And you know what?  It felt good, in a silly way.


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